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NewCasa
01-14-2009, 09:10 AM
Cold Weather Behavior…

60 above zero: Floridians turn on the heat. Gouligans plant gardens.50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People are sunbathing in the Soo.

40 above zero: Import cars won’t start. In Sault Ste. Marie, people drive with the sunroof open.

32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in the Goulais River gets a tad thicker.

20 above zero: New Mexicans don long johns, parkas and wool hats & mittens. Gouligans throw on a flannel shirt.

15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn on the heat. People in Batchewana have one last cookout before it gets cold.

Zero: People in Miami all die. In Echo Bay they close the windows.

10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. In the Soo, people dig their winter coats out of storage.

25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. Girl Scouts in the Soo are still selling cookies door to door.

40 below zero: Washington, D.C. finally runs out of hot air. People in Heyden let their dogs sleep indoors.

100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Gouligans get upset because the Mini-Van won’t start.

460 below zero: ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale). People in Wawa can be heard to say, “Cold ’nuff fer ya?”

500 below zero: Hell freezes over. White River public school opens 2 hours late.

Asparas
01-14-2009, 03:52 PM
Cute, but I like this one more:

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Canadians plant gardens.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
Italian Cars won't start
Canadians drive with the windows down


32° Fahrenheit (0 ° C)
American water freezes
Canadian water just gets thicker.


-0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
Canadians have their last BBQ of the season.


-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.


-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Canadians pull down their earflaps.


-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
Ethyl alcohol freezes.
Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.


-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.
Canadians start saying "cold, eh?"


-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over.
The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup