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Daiv
03-07-2014, 11:47 PM
Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?
You: I don't know.
Me: To see the idiot.

Me: Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Me: The chicken!!

Greatest part about this joke was when my husband told it to me.
A few days later, my three year old knocked on the bathroom door.
I said who is there and he said the chicken! Then he ran away giggling.
I told my husband later that HIS son called me an idiot, I think.

Daiv
03-10-2014, 10:00 AM
C'mon!
This is a good joke!
LAUGH people!!!!

Daiv
03-10-2014, 10:01 AM
25 Views and not one response?
Boo at you all!

hobo
03-10-2014, 02:47 PM
C'mon!
This is a good joke!
LAUGH people!!!!

It's not actually a joke but an anti joke and requires a special sense of humor of which I am lacking.

Daiv
03-10-2014, 03:00 PM
I don't know what the phrase anti-joke means.
A joke is a joke, is it not?
Kind of like a door is a door except for when it's a jar.

I think the chicken joke (anti-joke) is great.

hobo
03-12-2014, 08:11 AM
A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. When the judges had inspected all of the competing dogs, they remarked about the boy's dog: "He's not that shaggy."

This is your typical anti humor joke and some one out there probably things it's funny.

I was in my early teens when my friends started coming out with chicken crossing the road jokes and I never really got the hang of the humor involved and then there followed the elephant jokes and then there was the : What's purple and skims across the surface of the water jokes?

Daiv
03-12-2014, 09:38 AM
I don't get the shaggy joke.
There is no joke. It's not funny, unless I missed something.
And I don't know the elephant jokes.

Daiv
03-12-2014, 09:41 AM
I looked up anti-joke and they are basically a joke that doesn't have a punch line.
Like most chicken jokes.

This one does have a punch line because he is calling you an idiot. You being whoever the joke is being told to.

hobo
03-12-2014, 10:25 AM
I looked up anti-joke and they are basically a joke that doesn't have a punch line.
Like most chicken jokes.

This one does have a punch line because he is calling you an idiot. You being whoever the joke is being told to.

I get the gist of the joke but It's just not funny to me.

Why did the punk cross
the road? He had a chicken
stapled to his face.

Now this is hilarious. (to me) (and a Haiku)

Ah such is humor.

Daiv
03-13-2014, 07:53 AM
Yours isn't funny.
I guess different sense of humour.

The Berean
03-26-2014, 12:17 PM
Some things are funny for, A making fun of another type of joke, and B, just being totally bizarre.

I like puns.

Sticks float.

They wood.

Dookie
03-31-2014, 10:16 PM
I get the gist of the joke but It's just not funny to me.

Why did the punk cross
the road? He had a chicken
stapled to his face.

Now this is hilarious. (to me) (and a Haiku)

Ah such is humor.

These are both ridiculously stupid jokes....so stupid you have to laugh. Like, "What's brown and sticky? A STICK!" So stupid you have to laugh. They're funny, but not knee slapping funny :)

Dookie
03-31-2014, 10:17 PM
Some things are funny for, A making fun of another type of joke, and B, just being totally bizarre.

I like puns.

Sticks float.



They wood.

haha, that was punny!

The Berean
04-01-2014, 01:59 PM
...And I don't know the elephant jokes.

You don't?? You poor deprived child.

Listen carefully.

How many elephants can fit in a yellow Volkswagen? Answer - 4.

How do you know there's an elephant in your fridge? Answer - There are footprints in the butter.

How do you know there are two elephants in your fridge? Answer - You hear whispering.

How do you know there are three elephants in your fridge? Answer - You hear arguing.

How do you know there are four elephants in your fridge?











There's a yellow Volkswagen parked out front!!

Anna Noyance
04-04-2014, 02:47 AM
D u m b!

Daiv
04-07-2014, 03:15 PM
That was dumb, but I chuckled at the end.

The Berean
04-07-2014, 05:31 PM
Know any of the "no arms, no legs" jokes??

What's the name of a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall??









Art.

Anna Noyance
04-07-2014, 06:45 PM
What's the name of a guy with no arms and no legs in the water?






Bob

The Berean
04-07-2014, 10:06 PM
In a lions cage??





Claud.

Daiv
04-12-2014, 08:06 PM
What do you call two guys with no arms or legs hanging over your window
Curt 'n Rod

Anna Noyance
04-12-2014, 08:41 PM
What do you call two guys with no arms or legs hanging over your window
Curt 'n Rod

You made me laugh. I needed that!

Barry Morris
04-12-2014, 08:49 PM
With no arms and no legs in a hole in the ground?


Phil.

Anna Noyance
04-12-2014, 09:18 PM
With no arms and legs in a mailbox?



Bill

Daiv
04-12-2014, 11:10 PM
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs that sits on top of a podium?
Mike

The Berean
04-13-2014, 02:06 PM
Where will you find a horse with no legs??







Right where you left him!!!

The Berean
04-13-2014, 02:07 PM
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs laying on your porch??







Matt.

Anna Noyance
04-13-2014, 02:36 PM
A guy with no arms and legs in a bun?


Frank!

Daiv
04-13-2014, 07:13 PM
Guy with no arms or legs sitting in the bathroom.
John.

The Berean
04-14-2014, 04:54 PM
What do you call a dog with no legs??










Doesn't matter, he ain't gonna come anyway!!!

bouvs
04-14-2014, 08:33 PM
What did the maxi-pad say to the fart?



You are the wind beneath my wings.

Daiv
04-14-2014, 10:16 PM
What's the definition of bravery?

Daiv
04-14-2014, 10:18 PM
Anybody?

Daiv
04-14-2014, 10:20 PM
The answer is:
A man with diarrhea chancing a fart.

Daiv
04-14-2014, 10:21 PM
Why don't little girls fart?
Because they don't have ahem-holes until they get married.
Yuk yuk yuk.

bouvs
04-14-2014, 10:35 PM
What would you call a man with an IQ of 160 who has an anal fetish?

A smartfeller or a fartsmeller?

bouvs
04-14-2014, 10:37 PM
Why do farts stink?

So deaf people can enjoy them, too!

Igor
04-14-2014, 10:47 PM
Guess I will contribute.

If a wood cutter farts in the forest, and there is no one to hear it, does it make a sound?

If a forest ranger farts in the forest, and there is no one to smell it, does it make a smell?

Anapeg
04-14-2014, 10:51 PM
No arms and no legs in a lake?

Bob

Anapeg
04-14-2014, 10:51 PM
No arms no legs hanging on a wall
Art

Daiv
04-15-2014, 07:25 AM
No arms and no legs sitting in a parking lot?
Chevy

(That one was dumb, I know. )

Daiv
04-15-2014, 07:26 AM
The teacher asked little Johnny to use the word " definitely " in a sentence. Little Johnny replies, "Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?" The Teacher says, "Of course not Johnny," To which Johnny replies, "Then I have definitely shat in my pants,".

The Berean
04-23-2014, 04:25 PM
What is an elephant's favourite game??



Squash

Anna Noyance
04-24-2014, 07:31 PM
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?




Pumpkin PI

Daiv
04-24-2014, 08:33 PM
What is invisible and smells like carrots.



Rabbit farts.